SFGate has a story that looks more appropriate for ScrappleFace or The Onion.

Via Accidental Verbosity (post) and Pathetic Earthlings (post):

A Connecticut lawmaker wants to force movie theaters to pubish movie start times.

“We’re being robbed of our freedom of choice because we’re not told when the actual movie will begin,” said Fleischmann, a Democrat.

We’re being robbed of our freedom of choice because… movie theaters tell us when the previews begin instead of the movie?

That’s insane. I’m a strong believer that, once the lights dim for the first preview, the movie theater should be locked down, so I’m not inclined to support legislation that encourages people to walk in and disturb me while I’m enjoying the previews.

If State Rep. Andrew Fleischmann really wants to help moviegoers, he would legislate that all movie goers wear one of those dog collars that reacts to voices. Talk, and you get zapped. Sounds like a good idea to me.

Maybe I’ll run for the state legislature here in West Virginia.