I’m having lots of fun on Fox News today, commenting on a few older news items that didn’t really catch my attention the first time I heard them.

Like the racist treatment that Oprah Winfrey got when trying to shop at a boutique in Paris:

The incident occurred when Winfrey stopped by Hermes on June 14 to buy a watch minutes after the boutique closed. Though she and three friends said they saw shoppers inside, neither a sales clerk nor manager would let them in.

So… she went to a shop after it closed, they didn’t serve her, and that was racist treatment?

I stopped at my bank a few months ago and tried to get in the lobby after it closed (I misread the sign). The security guard came over to the door and glared at me for a minute before pointing at the sign. He was racist!

Look, I get that things aren’t perfect in this world, and that there are idiots who do make decisions with racial motives, but every time a minority feels slighted that isn’t, by itself, proof of racism.

I know a lot of people have a low opinion of Fox News, but they’re usually fairly reliable in their reporting, in my experience, regardless of how you feel about their editorializing.

Still, this just sounds like something out of a tabloid, doesn’t it?

The newly engaged Katie Holmes still has some explaining to do to her friends and family.

There were 16 days in April during which no one seems to know where she was.

…

Sometime that week, her friends say, she flew to Los Angeles for a meeting with Cruise about a role in “Mission: Impossible 3.” The meeting took place after April 11.

The next time anyone heard from Holmes was on April 27, when she appeared in public as Cruise’s girlfriend and love of his life.

Where was she during those 16 days?

Somewhere during that time, she decided to fire both her manager and agent, each of whom she had been with for years and who were devoted to her.

This makes complete sense to me. Heaven forbid that a children’s baseball team should actually be good.

</sarcasm>

I think the better solution to this would be to teach the other teams the valuable lesson that makes it possible for me to play competitive sports (or video games): “If you can’t do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly.”